I need help removing her.
she wants me to text her or call her all the time when we are apart...this is not high school...
People were stuck in the elevator screaming and freaking out. I banged on the door and yelled, "fire depart!" They got excited and then I ran away. lolz
I hope he's okay, but I also hope he shows up with an eyepatch
do you think having her use a clorox disinfecting wipe on her vagina will keep me from getting her herpes if I don't have a condom?
i just got painted green i'm not about to leave for anything
She counted 5,6,7,8 then intentionally kneed herself in the eye numerous times.
I woke up to an email from Groupon for 3 laser lipo treatments...on Valentine's Day...way to kick me when I'm down Groupon.
I hate cuddling. I also hate when people breathe. Which he did, a lot. So he can go to hell.
I want everyone to love me, and THEN I will choose who gets to eat me out all the time.
He left in the middle of the night, he left his shoes behind and stole my doc martens..size 6 female. Wtf?
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
Oh you know, the usual. We had a good date, I took her back home, she took off my pants, laughed, and left.
I'm trying to be sexual and you're sending me smashmouth lyrics
Awww I'm so proud! Starting friendships before you hook up!
Randomize
