dude did u upper deck my toilet?
haha like two months ago
i cleaned the bathroom like ten times before i realized what the smell was.....i hate u
She looked like Sean Connery with cleft lip. So to answer your question, yes I put it in her butt.
I used the word aforementioned in my paper. That's an automatic A in community college.
its my first week of college and i have a UTI
not easy being a whore now is it
He asked if I wanted to leave my bra on while we were doing it from behind bc he read somewhere that all that pounding can be painful for big breasts. THAT thoughtful.
I legitimately sent him a storybook of naked pictures.
Just made out with a girl I dated in high school, and she told me her girlfriend likes me. I like where this is going.
I have a bruise on dick where you tried to "high five" me.
Wanna get really high and go on a Valentine's Day Sexathon cause we're both single or would that be weird?
seriously, i never want to drink Robitussin again. her face was melting as i tried to convince her i wasnt high and i probably would have fucked ray. his parents thought i was a sweet charming lesbian.
This is why you are not allowed out in public.
Somehow I ended up in a different costume dancing with some tree of a guy in the basement bathroom, what did you give me?
Drunk Sam makes promises that Sober Sam can't keep
That was fun and all, but let's never have sex on a ladder ever again.
I'm too horny to sleep. I need some violent sex to wind me down.
This is going to be so stupid, but do you feel the calluses on my hands when I give you a handy?
Randomize
