Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
When I meet a new girl, I'm terrified of mentioning something she hasn't already told me but that I have learned from some light internet stalking.
The guy I was getting with last night took off his purity ring mid-sex and threw it across the room.
Ever since they found the bud they've been sending me visa gift cards instead of cash. Bastards.
Hes flirting with her via the sauce packets at taco bell....... I have no words
Important info for allergy season. An orgasm will unblock stuffy sinuses.
so, does the "dick the size of your forearm" thing run in the family then?
he said "be careful" then handed me a cheezit...
You just want to live out all your fuck fantasies with all these girls through me. I know your game. Well played sir.
So. Somehow managed to fuck my contacts out of my eyes. Didn't know that was even possible.
What section do you want to sit in? The screaming girls section or the "when you guys were popular I was straight and pretended not to like you guys" section?
His middle name is Julius so I named his penis Caesar and told him he has to say "Hail Caesar!" whenever he comes. He didn't seem to like the idea, though.
as a side note pls kill me
So...#1 on my TO DO list for college is to fuck someone somewhere in the stadium during the homecoming game...you down?
Randomize
