I have nothing to say, just wanted ur phone to vibrate
So yesterday I was on craigslist and I saw a listing for a sofa-cum-bed. I knew what they meant...
sorry about last night, I don't know what happened but I woke up this morning and looked strikingly similar to courtney love, it had to be bad.
Sharpest. Poop. Ever.
after he came i started crying. just to fuck with his head.
She was drinking straight whiskey out of her peacock shaped vase again.
im so sorry the vomit froze your passenger door shut... you should have stopped.
The more I stare at her and block out what she's actually saying with thoughts of what she could be saying, the more interested I become
I don't want to tell anyone! People who sleep with senators either end up in porn or guantanamo
I'm hungover from arbor mist I'm so white
I chased him for half a mile, lost him then somehow ended up at his house. Is that still considered stalking? I WAS drunk.
My boyfriend told me that I said I wanted to "feast on her vagina"... Glad I don't remember.
I've fucked him twice and literally had no idea that he's missing a thumb
With great boredom comes great irresponsibility.
Please tell me you're not on their roof again..
well theres no bloody mary mix at the campus bookstore so i dont even know what its good for
Randomize