Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he said he wished he had more hands so he could firmly hold my boobs.
fyi, we didn't break up, we just downgraded to occasional sex without ever talking about it.
Normal people don't sit around and watch Degrassi for twelve hours...
FUCK YOU.
I'm tempted to see how fat I can get before he leaves me. It's obvious we're playing a game of chicken here.
You ad-libbed two DETAILED rounds of price is right, 1 wheel of fortune, and 1 deal or no deal.... by yourself with sound effects and music included
No, you always delete them without reading. Enjoy the virtue of morning innocence. What are you doing today.
My birthday is in 11 days. Going ham. Consciousness will not be an option
my roommate made out with a guy wearing a squirrel costume, equipped with a blow up tail. time to start harvesting nuts for the winter
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Yeah well you try taking nice pictures while you have pizza crust lodged in your throat
I was telling my friend about your penis and the only word I could think of was voluptuous. You have a voluptuous dick.
My entire grocery store purchase consisted of Little Debbie snacks and Budweiser
It's cool bro. The video I have of you drunk trying to fix it with the sonic screwdriver was worth it.
I love him about as much as I'd love fucking myself with a cactus.
Randomize
