The dr is doing well, he randomly asked if I was bi
she just put all the cheese in the refrig to sleep.. and yes we did finish you bottle.
I was about to go down on her and her dong flopped out and hit me in the chin. This may have a Nam like post-traumatic-stress-disorder effect on me.
just saw a dude in a v-neck sweater on a bike drinking starbucks. way to feed the stereotypes white dude.
I am currently eating pure cake frosting...I am not sure how I was ever referred to as a responsible adult.
I'm just saying, asking "Are you happy with me?" during a handjob is simply unfair and scientifically inadmissiable.
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
Couple of things: my nipples are blue and knowing that at some point I'm going to have to poop is incredibly terrifying
I've seen people win free drinks for a lot less dude, no need to drop trou on a piano.
Zak is like the Picasso of masterbatory texts
You got this. You survived the RA last semester (granted you almost got arrested but still.)
Well I'm over here squandering a fabulous hair day and radiant complexion
Is it normal, that tacos make me horny?
All I wanted to do was come home from work and masturbate for national sex day... I sliced my the tip of finger giving myself a pedicure so I can’t even do that #singlelife
So, I think my BF has slept with several of our sorority sisters
Well, now that you know, yes he has. We didn’t say anything because you seemed so happy. He’s a great guy and none of us have any hard feelings, but yeah, we’re all very familiar with his penis and it’s talents
Randomize