why does hillary duff have a greatest hits album?
i recognized the place by the puke stain i left on the pool table when i hooked up with his roommate.
thats the sluttiest christmas spirit ever.
I don't think he wanted to hear that my most serious relationship was my 1 1/2 year fuck buddy... I think he figured out that's where he's heading
It's still to early in our relationship to tell her I was sleeping in my car
If those antibiotics mean you can't drink, ya might as well pack your bags and re-enroll next fall, because sobriety this week would be social suicide.
You are COMPLAINING that the sex was too good. You're not getting any sympathy from me
my spring break was before theirs and i literally fed him vodka all week, only stopping for class and bowls. like handles. i cant even think anymore, that chastity belt was hard to get off,
I'm not even mad. I was just trying to get a boner, you're the one that had to see that
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
I just accidentally showed an old lady a pic of my penis while showing her cat pics. So how's your day going?
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
I found you laying in a field of grass near the trail I jog on in the morning like a drunken Bambi.
YOU LICKED MY MAKEUP OFF.
I puked on someone's floor last night and then they proceeded to ask me on a date.
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