I totally ignored my nose and drank sour milk this morning. The tupid carton said 4/22/09. i puked everywhere..
White wifebeaters are like orgies with fat people. Enjoyable in private, i'm sure, but in public: no thanksss.
New universal law, if a movie has a Rob Zombie song in it, its probably a bad movie.
I just bought a CD. I feel like a traitor to my generation.
i just realized that fran drescher is the 90's version of a guidette.
so apparently dipping a tampon in red gatorade and throwing it out the window on the highway is a $100 fine
my roomates packed me a lunch. it had bread, cheesewiz, a can of refried beans and a condom with a note that said "good luck on your first day". im not even gonna pretend to be mad.
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
They called security on the security guard who tried to break up the party in their suite. You tell me how drunk they were.
just walked into the study room and found an empty bottle of vodka and a passed out freshman. Did you have anything to do with this?
I'm horny too so maybe we will both recap our regrets on Sunday
Wow has his pick up routine ever gotten bad. He is trying to use cheese as a way to flirt with the waitress
Oh man, he played the Harvarti cheese card and it didn't work. Now he is flailing
i just found my fake in the snow. LIFE IS AWESOME
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
When she's hammered the amount of alliteration that comes out of her mouth is amazing.
Randomize