Saw a dead body on the way to the casino. I think that's a good sign.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
How do you wash franks red hot sauce, whip cream, grapejuice and shame out of silk?
I would just throw it away. You cant just wash out shame, it has to soak for like a month.
No. No, there is no forgiveness for this. The only way I'm forgiving you for this is if you somehow convince your sister to have sex with me. In her car.
im hiding in a corner. drunk. with a plate of stolen jello shots. im pretty sure people are looking for me or the jello shots.
She just fell in the river. Meet us downstream with the bottle.
370HSSV 0773H read that upside down
what are you doing with your life
Don't let her tell you any different. She licked the balls of my hamster for that $100. It was a group bet. She won.
Just got a blowie during the Avengers. It's weird knowing that the high point of your life just happened.
And after we were done he said "Let's play a game! Who can find their clothes first"
Rumble strips road head = magical
"Wait, who's gun did I have?" Moments when you re-examine your life choices.
you know you've had too much sex when your vagina hurts when you laugh
Omg she's a human wrecking ball. I love it.
I am to reach this level of casual destruction.
Well I want to be mistreated and called a slut and finger banged
But I guess hugs would be nice
Randomize
