I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
Found out that it IS actually possible to get road head from somebody in the back seat
no more duck duck goose at the bar
I just scrubbed chocolate off the bathtub... You better have had a damn good birthday
Guess which frat house I just walked out of! And on a related note... guess who's uncircumsized
If you ever wanna get tagged teamed, army guys are pretty open to it. Write that down for future reference.
When i left he was drinking an entire pot of coffee out of the pot with a straw. It's safe to say he's using a personal day
Lesson learned the hard way. If it's a "no" on a dating site, it's also a no if you ever run into the person anyplace in public. It's a slap if you mention wanting to poke.
with the possibility that i could very easily fall in love with him and i've actually talked to my HUSBAND about it
You've got until 8 and then I'm kicking down your door and pouring a beer down your ass via funnel
Maybe snorting K off penises isn't healthy
I realized it was late, and he was my brother in humanity and another incarnation of my own life force and consciousness, so I regained control of myself, thanked him for helping me, and went home.
I got the security footage. Thank you boobies!
I just don’t understand what sort of USPS worker wants to take my unitard and sex toys.
So bottomless mimosas = me waking up in a truck bed in a random neighborhood with no purse or phone or idea how I got there.
Randomize
