there are 2 things i love giving: blowjobs & backrubs. how can i tell them that without sounding like a slut
I want him to get the hint. I sent 4 texts that only said "sex."
I've eaten cheese dip for three consecutive meals. I think I need to branch out.
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
Free tacos and bad night are never used in the same sentence
All I remember is waking up with 3 penises pointed at my face. I also remember enjoying that a lot. And then I threw up in their shower.
Found my underwear in a solo cup. That about sums up this weekend.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
Bang-toberfest begins!!
GUESS WHO GOT ABSOLUTELY WASTED LAST NIGHT AND SPENT AN HOUR RAMBLING ABOUT KRAFT DINNER, HOCKEY, AND THE LAST TEMPTATION OF CHRIST
You got Broadway Drunk, dude. I haven't heard you sing "Music Of The Night" like that since the last time I was holding you up on the way to the subway at two in the morning.
SEX BINGO!
Canadian or clown?
I dont know how I should feel about you making a 37 year old come visit you and then making him do the walk of shame from your dorm room...through campus
I was covered in mud from my knees down, I smelt like the inside of a port-a-potty and only had mascara on one eye. . . so you know your usual Sunday brunch.
We sat at the bar and made fun of everyone around us. I'm in love
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