She can't drink and she can't smoke weed. She might as well be dead to me.
well judging by the amount of dired blood around my nipple rings i'm gonna assume it was a good night
Just found custom condoms. Guess I'm not getting any work done today.
I mean, we started to hook up but my asthma attack kind of killed the mood
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
Ok so I could say "im sorry"...but instead ill just say "unsupervised...jager...military guys...green school bus called the juice box...and HUGE dick"
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
It's ok that you're screwing someone else while trying to get back with me, I'm banging three girls while I ignore you.
my mom just walked in on me in the shower doing the "ass hair shave" pose.
He started humming whilst eating me out. At first it was weird, but my new motto is now don't knock it before you've cum from it
Model at car show < day drinking with your favorite sister. Get your head in the fucking game Christopher.
Also I've come to learn that "type" and "fetish" are different things. Apologies for earlier confusion.
Thanks for putting up with my drunk friend last night. Its all fun and games till someone pukes macaroni under your fridge.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
He's gonna turn my vagina into the Sahara desert
Randomize
