Just heard a guy discussing with someone else the amazing blow job you gave him. I’m in New York. Over 2 hours away from where you live. I have never been more proud.
Right now, my father is sitting on the couch, totally smashed, crying, eating pringles, and watching the credits of Transformers 2. Love him.
She bet her virginity on the Celtics. Looks like Kobe wont be the only one breaking in a new ring.
Everything's fine I'm just stoned and my pillows are too soft.
We could be the people that go there! Shuffleboard n shit. Meet strippers.
You had me at shuffleboard and strippers
Fuckers are stealing our internet and making my porn stream slowly so I changed the password for VanceRefrigeration to RyansaCunt. No spaces but capitalization.
I get that he's ugly and I deserve better but I will still beat up the girls he hangs out with.
I think it's god's punishment for my behavior in Vegas . Lies were told. Angels were defiled. Pools were pissed in
The 12 year old son winked and made eyes at me while his father fed me vodka gummy bears. Gameday yo
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Allow me to explain. Triple D is a surprise. It's like if you're expecting to fight one person, then you get ambushed by more. Except it's a good ambush, because it's boobs, not death.
He tripped and fell all the way to the ground and then stood right back with out spilling a drop of his 3/4 full glass of rum and coke. It was like watching something from the matrix
Why would you ask him if you could lick his chest?
He has a very lickable chest
Last night was fun. Sorry I slipped out before you woke up
Also, your parents get up REALLY early. Please thank them for the bagel and travel mug of coffee. Happy Thanksgiving!
Randomize
