Her vagina felt like a horse was eating an apple out of my hand..
Some 6 yr old girl just got on my plane in St. Louis. She was wearing an I Love Canada shirt. She eyed the seat next to me and I stared her straight in the eyes and shook my head. Fuck her. Fuck canada.
Her divorce is going to cut into the amount of time we spend fucking.
I'm in awe of how selfish that is.
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
i will be blacked out in the shower. come get me. 20 mins.
We are smoking a hash blunt ... Bring your emergency inhaler
So another one of your girlfriends from middle school had a baby. Thank god you are gay, otherwise you would definitely be a dad by now.
I didn't think it was possible but he dislocated his thumb during intercourse last night then cried
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I vote we just hike, drink, and destroy dick
Don't put me in that position. I am not qualified to be the responsible adult here.
That's okay I'm failing college because I'm to busy giving over the pant handjobs in class..
The night they met I slept with both of them. Of course I'm best man.
it’s my vagina i can do what i want to
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