I got everything I ever gave her back, every picture, and money for the dog. I didn't want it she brought it all back and gave it to me. clothes jackets, pictures, dried flowers, ear rings, necklace...
Sell it on ebay and let's go to the bar
Fun fact: tonight on intervention was the guy who did my tattoo
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
i hooked up with some kid with a broken arm and he wouldnt even let me sign his cast
I'm sorry for throwing the cheese everywhere, but it wasn't my fault. No one was enforcing disipline so not really my fault for not behaving
We were fucking on his hammock and right as he came we flipped over. I landed on him, he landed on a pile of pinecones. We're done with nature sex.
let's just say I never want to get pulled over and have to explain to the cop why I'm wearing a false beard again.
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
my first words to him the next morning were "do you like magic"?
I'm pretty sure that our Lady and The Tramp Red Vine moment was the farthest I got last night
I stopped for beer and woke up to a bird on my shoulder. I really need to stop drinking
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