If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
i licked the inside of a toilet bowl for $14. i really can't talk about my night.
I just want dick. Yours just gets priority because it is glorious
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
You want anything?
Gatorade and you naked.
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
Alive.
So much puke
And to add, there was a fat guy right next to me who, when the girls would shake their butts, he would let out a shrill xena warrior princess cheer
I fell on my face, puked, and had to be rocked to sleep in a hammock. I'd say Europe is a success
You're the only person I know who can be puking into a trash can at 8 in the morning in Manhattan and get a date out of it....
But seriously I don't know. I haven't seen her since I gave her back her 3 blind mice stick, and she just started hitting everybody with it.
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
So, I woke up under a table with an alarm clock on my face, my hair in a bag of popcorn, and my phone charger wrapped around me.. what happened?
Randomize
