made out with the bouncer to distract him from how illegitimate my fake id is.
i have one hour to talk myself into enjoying giving him a blow job when i get home
The camp director doesn't care if we drink and i'm running the rifle range. Someone is going to get sued.
You dont understand he had a split tongue thats bucket list worthy.
have i crossed some slutty boundary when gay guys are sending me cock pics?
We crashed a rave, threw glitter all over Gay Dan and the bartender, broke a chandelier and called ourselves the Kings of Neon.
I have a kicked-out-of-multiple-bars level hangover today
Wanna smoke some ancient weed I just found in a box of cake mix?
A man can only lie in bed watching COPS for so long before he wants to do things that can lead him to starring on the show.
he rolled over in the morning and told me happy valentines day. i don't even know his first name.
Like people might wonder why I put up with your puns. You give good head and play with my hair
Is it bad when I wake up sore & don't know if my injuries are from sex or the mechanical bull at the bar?
Executive decision.... we are cuddling naked
is 250 jello shots considered an open container?
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
