does wine, beer, and vodka mix well??
dude, everything can mix, this is college.
The wedding was scheduled to start 5 min. ago. 20 people here so far, groomsmen in tees and jeans, catering by Costo. NO ONE OUR AGE IS READY FOR MARRIAGE!
My vagina has become a graveyard for my brother's friendships...
It's not fair. Guys with dicks that huge should not be allowed to be catholic.
there is potential here for me to have a consistent access to someone's dick who isn't actually an asshole. i think i'm ready for a relationship.
I think I pulled my groin stumbling back from the bar. That or the hippo I woke up next to.
It's because you were crossfaded. And because drinks were 3 dollars. And because they accepted credit cards.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Have to get circumcised. Doctor goes, "On the bright side, you can tell people your dick is too wide."
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
Another reason why I like dubstep now, it makes me feel even higher than I already am.
Dear god. Please. Please do NOT deprive yourself of dick for 90 days. Blood will spill. Wolverines will howl. I can't handle that kind of terror.
He reached a whole new level of creepy. We were getting a coffee and he noticed the girl at Starbucks name tag looked her up on fb and friend requested her right there without ever introducing himself
It was a fun night! I woke up with a boyfriend, again....
It's 8 in the morning and you're doing coke and drinking margaritas. First, you have a problem. Second, why didn't you invite me?
Randomize
