You know how my eyes change color? Well I noticed after I hook up with someone my eyes are greener.
Wow, so you're like the Edward Cullen of sluts.
This just in: Jon Gosselin's address-The Alexandra. I bet if we showed up he'd date us.
you threw up in someones recycling bin and left a note apologizing. how drunk do you think you were?!
He wants to be 'in an open relationship'. Fuck that. That's the online equivalent of letting him pee in a circle around me.
I don't remember much but I know I looked hot.
How was me telling you it's my mom's birthday a go-ahead to bang my sister???
All i remember about last night is holding a bottle of bacardi and screaming challenge accepted!
It's pathetic. My bed hasn't been this sexless since it was in bedmart.
He got weirdly turned on by the video of my cat licking nacho cheese off my finger.
so it turns out the huge bruises on my knees are from drunk bmxing and not getting railed from behind on the ground
and ill have you know that I only wiped out twice
If making out with three guys at once at a Kesha concert while simultaneously smearing glitter all over yourself doesn't convince her you're gay, nothing will
Pretty sure that propositioning you to fly across the country for sex fest '13 isn't something my husband would approve of.
Got to work this morning and thought... Did I really dance on that pole last night
I woke up this morning wearing his boxers as a shirt
I'm making myself the patron saint of bisexuality
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