I just smoked a bowl while riding a horse. This has been a productive vacation.
I don't have the urge to be a home-wrecker with these two. I think I've grown, don't you?
At least we kept it together. It's people like him who yell at bushes that give acid a bad name
Your "OraGel will numb anything" theory was the worst thing I ever believed in.
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
all I know is I'm really rwfly really really stoned and a bunch of Korean people are yelling at me
Dinner?
YES CON MARGARITAS POR FAVOR!!!! MUCHO MARGARITAS!!!
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
currently googling "apology gifts for when you poop on their floor"
Why can't burritos get me drunk
We were getting fries and you hopped the counter and yelled "WELCOME TO GOOD BURGER HOME OF THE GOOD BURGER" and threw up
Actually, I may scrap this entire plan. I just realized that I had sex with a guy with his own whiskey commercial.
he's been 21 for 38 minutes and he's already trying to fist fight this dude over his girl
awwwww babys first drunken mistake
i don't know when underwear became an acceptable clothing choice for parties, but god help me i hope this isn't a passing trend.
went to class still drunk this morning and my professor made the class give me a round of applause and said, "see people, THIS is inspirational... if she can make it to class in this condition there is no excuse not to show up!"
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