Yes, one should always join a cult. At least once.
chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I miss having pregnancy scares ....at least i knew i was having a good time
how do I set my phone to only ring when I'm asleep when sex is certain?
some girl that im facebook friends with has H1N1, im scared to even go to her facebook page
This unplanned pregnancy thing is really taking all the fun out of football season.
is drinking for groundhog day legit?
well you blacked out on MLK day and we pregamed arbor day, so yes
He dropped me off at 4 in the morning because I made fun of Pearl Jam..
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
Think of it this way, instead of a puppy, we're getting a baby.
I've honestly never felt so much emotion towards a wall
In related news, I couldn't want to blow you more if your dick made harmonica noises.
You were so proud of your stupid "magic trick" but all you did was piss on the couch. don't talk to me for a few days.
How long is enough time to schedule homosexual exploration... Like an hour?
He dropped some cash when he got in my front seat upside down. And a hat. I'm keeping them as retribution for not remembering that he had sex with me once before. Although, if he didn't have his dick pierced, I wouldn't have remembered either.
Randomize
