Just made out with a pet sitter. His biz card says "even hamsters". Lowest point in my life.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
I hate it when hot girls behave. It's so anticlimactic
I feel like I just tasted lung cancer.
private study room at the lib turned into byob study room. that turned into battle royale and eric impaling his leg on a pen.
I think I'm just going to up-end a bottle of wine and look through pictures of what my life used to be.
Come over we're celebrating the one month anniversary of her first 4/20
We'll talk about this tommorrow when I'm not mistaking my fingers for French fries....
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Turns out Edward 40 hands and life-sized jenga is really hard...Didn't stop you from trying. How is your concussion?
My goal is to have my roommate find me sprawled out in the middle of my floor naked and passed out. Maybe with some Alfredo chicken hanging out of my mouth. I don't know, we'll see where this goes.
Don't judge me like that. At least the house is getting cleaned. If I have to drink and listen to Disney music on repeat for that to happen, so be it.
I'm pretty sure I have PMS because I almost just cried about not being able to find a place that gives acrobat classes here.
Last night I drank three beers and threw up in a tree house. I am ashamed.
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