I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
whos cum tastes better, a guy who drinks apple juice or cranberry juice?
I say that when we get our grades back we're making a drinking game out of it.
Congrats to the girl that left her positive preggo test in the bathroom...
In an m&m suit playing manhunt drunk. And you thought you werent guna have a good time
I just banged your sister. Thats what you get for takibg my lunch money in 2 grade, boom, boom fiyyaa powaa
About to see some guy and give him a glance that tries to express how sorry i am for blowing his friend while he was getting a BJ in the same room
He asked if I smoke and I said "only fools like you on the basketball court!" Then I started crying. I think I'm about to have my period.
Make sure you have everything youll need until sunday. aka a green shirt and condoms.
He's currently surrounded by roughly 23 girls he fucked and never called. He may not make it out of here. Bar of doom? Or of redemption?
In case you were wondering, yes I did just watch the Katy Perry movie alone on a Saturday night. I'm so alone it makes a noise.
He just unloaded a dump truck full of red flags on my head.
SOME DUDE PUT OUT FOR A MCCHICKEN AND YET YOU STILL WON'T FUCK ME
I'm so high right now that I winked back at a character in this TV show.
An old Grimace plushie came to life and gave me a pretty knife. I'm never doing acid again.
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