i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
his cum tasted like old pizza and looked like old milk
also: i found my "nug jug", actually the baby did, but either way it got returned to its rightful owner
I came so hard that my back seriously popped like 5 times.
But fine, we can play that game. You can come over and we can have totally platonic, long, boring discussions. Or we can fuck. Whatever.
Just come here and visit. Enjoy the deliciousness of me being legal. Just don't think, and come here right meow. meow meow meow.
we couldn't find any funnels so we taped a spaghetti strainer to a pool noodle and it worked fairly well
He's def the type to chop us into bits whilst screaming "NAPA BITCH". AKA my type
we gave you a glass of water and you just started yelling: TWO STRAWS, PATS AN ENGINEER HE'LL FIGURE IT OUT
Well yeah connect the two together, then you can lay down and drink.
A little, yeah. We were stealing firewood from the neighbors (drunk), and figured it would be 10 times harder to be angry with us if we got caught if we were naked, and 100% more hilarious.
He just compared our sex to a grand slam on Wii fitness
You're doing it right
I hate men. But I love dick. You see my problem?
just because he was passed out beside the toilet, didn't give you tge right to pee on him
my aim is off when im drunk
The weekend was a blur. There was vodka and penises and orgasms. I played a game of Cock Roulette and won big
It's like the perfect sandwich, once you find it you want to ensure your future access to it.
Randomize
