I'd fuck her but she fucked Dusty. And I'm pretty sure he's humped livestock
so Brent and I ordered you a drink then realized you don't live here. I drank it.
Eww. Jon Gosselin got both his ears pierced.
He looks like a bad one night stand.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
And then he said "my dick isn't hard enough and your tits aren't big enough for this to work"
I just jerked off and used a stopwatch to track my results. Pretty depressing on multiple fronts.
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
You know the party was great when the birthday girl gets arrested
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
That's fine. It's not illegal to bring ham into a museum.
Do you remember the bathroom attendant when he put out his hand for a tip and you gave him a high five?
U know this is gone far when im in the bathroom trying to take a pic of my asshole
I think he thought I was too drunk to handle his parrot
I was sleeping and woke up in the bathroom already puking like i slept walk. Perrrrrrfect.
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
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