I hate my date so much right now for even thinking I want to do the electric slide.
therell be strippers and coke right?
no strippers. just coke.
i hate this fuckin recession
so i was supposed to be to work at 8..but its 9:15 and im currently standing stoned in the middle of holiday...with a bag with three doughnuts, two redbulls, and a slim jim..
god i miss watching you do this...
some guy just asked me if water gets in a vag when girls take a bath. WTF. it's not a wind tunnel!
the chick you hooked up with on my couch facebook friended me.
just thought you should know her name is kristen
Only if you bring Listerine. I can't come home to my husband from a bachelorette party with spermbreath again.
Wearing the flip cup varsity team sweatshirt was the best descision of my life.
Huh. I think I went to highschool with the hooker my neighbor just brought home.
You passed out with your mouth on the faucet, straddling the keg, with your arms wrapped around it
My favorite part was screaming to all my life by kc and jojo and just horribly failing
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
SOMEONE WITH THE TWITTER HANDLE "METHLAB" FAVORITED THAT PICTURE
Also fuck yeah conspiracy
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
While the cops were busting my party one of them said. O you have an Xbox? Do you play online? Whats your gamertag?....
Randomize
