Played the LOTR drinking game last night. Ended up in boxers running thru the lot at ross's place screaming "for frodo"
I was going through my mom's high school yearbook...almost half the people who signed it referred to her as "Karen Smokejoints", "Confused Karen", or drew a picture of a joint. I have never felt more like her daughter.
I'm going to leave the fate of whether I go to my midterms up to my dealer hitting me up or not
On second thought, trying to signify she was a butter face by wiping my bagel on her cheek may not have been in my best of interests
I think I just found part of a tooth on my bed... What goes on in here?
I'm kind of concerned that there are now two different videos of me with knives
Can I sell my birth control in a yard sale?
Like lay upon bear skin rugs, drink brandy and reminisce of the yesteryear's before a majestic fire place? Because those are my plans.
Let's get really high and wear fake mustaches and try not to laugh at each other...
The forecast for tonight is alcohol and low expectations.
You're the only meteorologist I listen to.
The last thing I remember was riding in a grocery cart with two strangers while a cop pushed us
Google imaged your anal issues. Seems fuckable still.
I got so drunk last night that I was drunk in my dream. Good night
the girl who hid my weed when the cops came has a birthday coming up. i feel like i should get her something.
The blonde cop looked at my license and told me I better have be home when her shift ends
I hate you
Randomize
