Potential corruption. He's 19.
Get them while they're young!
so when i dont talk to her she talks to herself...idk whats worse
So, apparently I made everyone omelets last night. Even when I'm drunk, I'm still a trophy wife.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
I AM OVULATING LIKE A STEAM ENGINE.
The last thing I remember is ordering two Martinis while yelling 'CAN YOU PUT THAT IN ONE GLASS?'
My dad caught me fucking in the pool last night. He proceeded to tell me I needed to "quiet things down" while this guys dick was still in me. Worst daughter ever.
I think we've had way too many heart to hearts in the Mc Donalds parking lot for this to be a healthy relationship
Letting two friends screw at my place in exchange for weed. This is my life.
i don't knpow whats goin on i think theyre sacrificeing me to th tequila gods
I just had to take a picture of someone whose testicles are bigger than my fists combined. Living the dream.
In honor of Dennis Farina dying, I'm offering up free mustache rides...2 takers so far.
What exactly is it about Doctor Who thigh high socks with a matching shirt that says "take me I'm yours!"
It smells like graded cheese and febreze in the family room what the hell have you been up to???
Used my power pack to charge my vibrator so I didn't have to unplug my switch or my galaxy lamp. TECHNOLOGY!
Randomize