K I think ***** turned off her phone. Guess I can't make her feel any more miserable tonight so I'm goin to sleep
I got fucking wesley sniped last night by that power hoe. How'd it end up on your end? Did you canoodle the stripper enough for her to agree to go to formal?
your life is more of a joke than dina lohan.
if you\'re going to compare me please pick the classy one. Michael Lohan.
the cashier at riteaid just made the sign of the cross before he rang up my pregnancy test. now i know god is on my side
He told me he could read braille... with his tongue. So I took him home. I don't think he was lying
we are watching a video on ethics because somebody wrote "butt sex" on the attendance sign in sheet
He made me write my name on his wall in crayon so he'd be able to remember it in the morning
I have a physical this friday. On a scale from 1-10, 10 being the most judgemental gay bashing, how much judgement am I gonna get from my dr when he checks my balls and sees the cherry tattoo
I crawled out his bedroom window, forgetting he lives in a split level and there is a 10 foot drop back there. I had to text him to come help me I twisted my ankle.
It's disgusting. He breathes through his mouth and just sounds fat. Plus he chews all loud and shit.
You are not the cause of late onset lesbianism.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
Is using La Croix as a mixer for vodka a legit way to reach my daily water consumption?
Did your grand seduction include learning to play careless whisper on a kazoo or was that just a hobby
probably because i sent a bunch of guys a snap saying happy one year to my nipple piercings
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