She said so on her MySpace, so it's gotta be true.
Instead of just putting in it he asked "will you do the honors?" it was the cutest thing I had ever heard before sex.
As long as there aren't any pictures of me humping the penguin, we are good,
Just asked the bartender if I could use the register to see my grades.
Im in your car brotha dog. Its was unlocked, so im gonna sleep in it. well i mean i think its your car be your car.
He told me he wanted a penis beard so that he could look at girls faces when they gave him blowjobs. i have to say, i kind of admire his creativity
The chick got into the cab with us and said we have 3 chances to guess what she just stuck up her ass. Hello to you to!
I need to be more functional. That doesn't mean I'm going to drink less, I just need to wake up and shit
You can wear anything you want
So... Naked it is then
I'd just like to inform you. That when I was at bvj the first day I was blackout drunk by noon. Get on past Chelsea's level like now. Do it for present Chelsea
I keep getting congratulated for drinking 2 six packs of mikes hard and winning the Olympic marathon and I don't remember this shit and now my throat is on fire
I'm actually more excited that I had so much sex this weekend that my ovaries hurt
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
So high I legit spent 20mins in the shower just holding my tits cuz they feel bigger than normal.
we were running around the halls trying to bloodhound search out the source of the weed smell, but we ran into six other people doing the same thing, and they all said they assumed it was us.
Randomize
