CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
my passenger side seat is covered in alcoholic jello with a nude mannequin in it
She's like the pied piper of lesbians.
Dave a horae rider a coqw boy
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I'm giving you a get out of sober free card for one of the nights
You can't tell me you've honestly NEVER considered smoking a Froot Loop
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
Where are you in relation to the mariatchi band?
Only you would get a side of potential vagina with your sandwich
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
How awkward is it to have the guy you used to sleep with congratulate you on your engagement? I'll tell you. Very.
At one point I had two blunts in my hand and had no idea where they came from.
This is the third time I have overheard parents tell their children "don't be that girl" in reference to me. I'm either doing something horribly wrong or amazingly right
Randomize
