she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
Acid is not a monday night drug
Every time I hit my bowl my neighbors set off fireworks... I stop, they stop. I start again, they start again. Too high for this.
I truly believe that the solid foundation of any healthy relationship is a drunken one night stand so I can just get all the nasty shit out on the table
The slutty girl scout law, revised for halloween 10: on my honor i will try, to serve my vagina and my shot glass. To hold back friends hair at all voming moments and to live by the sluttly girl scout law.
does it count as a threesome if she tried to blow the dude who was passed out next to us?
Results of pregaming honors college basketball social: 18 points, 3 blocks, and 3 flagrant fouls leading to 2 broken bones on former valedictorians. I'm doing this more often.
If drinking before honors events and injuring our universities brightest doesn't get you kicked out of the program, you're not trying hard enough.
Both his mom and his sister were hitting on me when I stopped by today. He isn't a real friend anyway, right?
I think he offered to cook me dinner or cook me for dinner. Not really sure. Just smiled and nodded.
Oh aight, and i was just going to be content with drinking, beating off and watching ninja turtles
so he had an ashton kutcher Kelso haircurt. dude, we're in our mid to late 20s, I don't think we can ridicule guys for having hair anymore.
Uhh dog found a condom. FYI its on the table by couch please dispose of it. No reply Necessary
he just ran into my room in his giant penis costume yelling "supercock to the rescue"... I am still in total shock
Can finally say I won't be lonely this Valentine's day! Mother nature decided to drop by.
This might be the worst thing you've ever done.
Really? I feel like I've done worse. Guess I gotta step my game up.
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