are we going to glenview for practice??
(3 hrs later) aids
where r u? what is story? im way too high right now
You got so drunk you kept singing the Sailor Moon theme song and kept making everyone call you Sailor Venus.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
Just registered some guy for opium withdrawals. WTF opium withdrawals, who does opium anymore.
I just realized I have my pepper spray, gun, and vibrator all in one drawer. One false grab and I'm screwed either way.
The handjob she gave me was better than the best blowjob I've ever gotten.. Just imagine the possibilities.
The waitress bought us a round. She said if anyone could do 52 margarita mondays in a row, it was us.
She was puking in a plastic bag while cleaning where she puked on the floor. She knows how to multitask.
He started using my brother's rc helicopter as a beer delivery device. He's a drunk McGyver.
this year we will have multiple halloween identities. lesbian couple meets brian and stewie
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
You're never gonna guess who's blood is on my shirt
Why do I feel like I really don't want to hear the end of this...
How did I get the fat lip, while puking I may or may not have sneezed... Wacking my face into the toilet bowl...
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Like at first he was barely doing anything. So I was like harder and then holy shit he's like going all HULK SMASH on my vagina. I mean it felt fucking awesome. BUT STILL
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