i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
would you ever date a girl who drove an 89 Chrysler LeBaron? - for the record it's a convertable
I wonder what it would be like to be a slice of cheese.
We really need to stop competing to see who can get more drunk, and I REALLY need to stop winning.
To say the least, now you know you're a proper lady, passing a field sobriety test in heels...
I'll sleep on the bed... The couch is now designated banging area. Any banging performed outside of that area will be subject to fines of cleaning up stains.
Apparently I used ziplock bags to smuggle my drink out with. By pouring it in one, then cut the corner like it was an icing bag later that night. What is wrong with me?
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Ahahhahaha I'm not that stupid but then again I thought cabo was in Africa until yesterday
It felt like Party Santa dropped by and gave us two more 18-packs.
Ya know what's been the best part of this College Football Season? Not having to hear Brent Musberger say the Honey Badger 77 fucking times.
You kept saying you only wanted to drink until you were sleepy. You succeeded if "sleepy" means you sleepied around with 4/6 of the guys there.
Would it be totally inappropriate to have his frat and our sorority Teebowing our exit from the abortion clinic?
You and your vagina are hellbent on selfdestruction and bad decisions
Dude...can we put that on a tshirt? I will totally sport that shit.
If we were teenagers we would intentionally be trying to burn down this historic landmark
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