I wasn't excited about it either, but if I was going to have her take a load on her face, role playing as some french dude is the least I could do
Beverly Hills, 90210. Cleveland Browns, 0.
She was adopted and used to dance at Sapphire. just my speed.
It's great when the cashier at the liquor store asks "weren't you wearing those clothes yesterday"
Its the anniversary of our epic NBA All-star game weekend. The night the two of us cashed a 30-pack while watching the dunk contest
I'm making myself a nametag with my contact info and pinning it to myself like a kindergardenter in case I get lost when I black out on Sat.
Can we laminate it? Just to be safe.
But I wanna cuddle and just put my hand awkwardly close to your penis area by accident and look at you
Today has been like a snow day for your boobs. No rules, just doing whatever they want.
I spent the day drinking wine and meditating. I'm zen as fuck.
If you want it you better put a ring on it. And by ring I mean one of my three favorite pies.
I'm tempted to randomly yell out 'SO HOW IS YOUR UNDERAGE GIRLFRIEND' but that would be callous
If I die on my walk home, please come claim the body. There is $30 in my left shoe for you....for pizza
He propositioned me for a threesome once so yeah I'd say he has what it takes to run for public office
"Because this is an ongoing legal matter" is how his morning after sex text began. So...
He literally poured blue Gatorade on me after we had sex and said "good game" all over my white sheets
Randomize
