Even though he is humpbacked he is really good in bed.
Game over. He has a paternity test request on his table.
You've got the short couch unless you find some girl to take you home
Challenge accepted.
Just found out my 21st birthday is on a Wednesday. The possibilities are cheap, as well as endless.
You know you drank too much last night when your mouthwash tastes like water
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
Everyone is now just referring to it as "the night Hannah couldn't get laid" so needless to say you didn't miss much
You tried to sit down... There was a distinct lack of couch.
The feeling I get when I hear beer bottles clinking must be what children feel when they hear sleigh bells on Christmas Eve
How do I tell my hairdresser I want a hair style I saw in a porn video?
What happened?
New Orleans
Every time
I fell out of the car while it was moving then got puked on then puked and cried about then got back in the car and puked out the window when we started moving again
He's coming over again? GIRL, you're thoroughly enjoying the month of Dicktember.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Your dick is the only reason I have motivation to come back to school today
Randomize
