I was totally willing to let her keep giving me blowjobs as long as she didn't think we were in a relationship.
TBS has betrayed me by telling me tyler perry is funny
If your still trying to figure out the moment I stopped caring; it was the point in which you said "I really wasn't sure whose baby it was"
do you think the kids from 7th heaven are mad that dennis and sweet dee are their half-brother and sister?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
We eventually get in a cab (after david tried to hail multiple regular cars and some sort of shuttle bus)
I feel like I have streams of color and coldness wrapping around my body.
Just so you know, you're MY booty call. Feel degraded.
how the fuck is Katelyn 5'1" and 85 lbs and she tackled a bouncer to the ground?
Seriously, do normal people actually get work done being this hungover? No wonder the economy's in the shitter
"Clean/organize my room day" turned into "Blast my old Jock Jams cds while getting high as fuck with a strobe light day"
No I have an idea, I saw you running through the neighborhood at 3am while I searched for my flip flops in a ditch
I told him I was on my period but he says "I'm a doctor, you think I can't handle blood?" And just went for it. Jackpot
The usual, icing my vag with a chimichanga.
As you were falling you yelled out, "save my burrito!" Priorities
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