you got kicked out last night because right after you said "whats up?" to us, you downed your whole vodka ton and threw it across the bar.
You were so drunk last night you typed www.face.come/cheese.com as if you were logging into facebook.
I'm looking at pot farms on google earth. Google should be proud I found a real purpose for it to serve.
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
Sitting on the floor in my kitchen eating taquitos. Being this drunk the next day has lost its allure post graduation.
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
this will be a night to untag.
I just asked the bartender if I could get insurance on my drink in case I spilled it.
Jello bowls to the fucking face, that or ramen spiked with liq. Those are the only options in this house.
Tiny.
I mean tony. It's like autocorrect knows he wasn't well endowed.
Please tell me you're not home alone watching Glitter.
Can you see in?
Two run-ins with cops/park rangers tonight and now I'm just wandering around high and shirtless
Sacramento doesn't deserve you
DID YOU DO SOMETHING WITH THE DEAD ROACH IN THE KITCHEN? OR DID IT LAZARUS?
MORE IMPORTANTLY I THINK I JUST WATCHED SOMEONE GET SO LONELY AS TO TURN BISEXUAL??
11% beer and firearms, what could possibly go wrong?
Randomize
