you ever fart during an orgasm? feels like u just lost 10 pounds
i think at one point throughout the night i began eating birthday cake with a q-tip.
herpes texted me again. he says he wants my vagina.
ok we should really consider changing this guys nickname...
Goldfish can't live in a bowl filled with tequila, lesson learned.
Harry Potter. Singing. Sobering up. In that order.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
The shit show didn't end. it just relocated itself to my apartment instead of yours.
you also need to get my treadmill fixed.
You grinded and hooked up with a middle aged tiger woods look-a-like with manboobs. Tequila isn't for you.
Can't decide if I want to watch full house or the fleet wood Mac concert during the presidential debate.
i want to shrink myself down to penis size, climb inside of her pussy and just live there for a few months.
I just tinder matched with a blue angels pilot. I need to make out with him. For America.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Apparently karate chopping the fronts off all the paper towel and soap dispensers in the bathrooms isn't even frowned upon. Like even at the third bar when I fell flat on my back trying to jump kick the last one some guy just helped me up and high fived me. America.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
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