i just want his dick, seriously i'm about to take trifiling lessons. we'll call my alter-ego blair and she will screw his brains out, girlfriend or not.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
As soon as I saw the video camera and red light on, I started rolling my eyes when he would put it in me and telling him maybe his dick was too small cause I didn't feel anything...trust me that tape is going nowhere
just realized we made a drinking game to how many times they say "hakuna matata" in the lion king last night... hello sophomore year.
okay, certainly we can't screw this up, and even as I type, I know we will
Something strange is happening to me, I think I miss hooking up with girls sober
not much sitting here stoned eating my little sisters halloween candy and judging each individual hersheys candy bar and after much deliberation by the selection committee the original hersheys chocolate bar won
Crazy how fast a room full of drunk teenagers sober up when someone breaks his parents' new flat screen
When your boyfriends ex-girlfriend texts you to see what you're wearing to his sister's wedding that you were not invited to, nor knew about. I think it's time to call it quits.
Yeah haha but we have no idea where his keys are. Last night was awful. Him and Chancey were in a fully embraced bro hug at one point. Both crying.
I woke up and discovered I gave new meaning to the term "pizza pockets" yes it's exactly like it sounds like
we should definitely drink gin again. soon.
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
I got a pots and pans set and a vibrator. Merry Crisis.
operation Bang Australian Boy = oh so successful
Randomize
