Did you see 7 ppl got hurt at Talladaga?
Did they get their mullets stuck in an engine?
Turns out they use me as an example of What Not To Do at freshman orientation. My little brother told me.
there was a kid getting taken out of the waterpark handcuffed to a wheelchair singing "tryna catch me ridin dirty"
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
I was about to smoke a bunch of weed and lay naked while I cried all day
I spent the whole party making out with some guy. He wasn't that cute but six of my sorority sisters are fighting over him so I had to do something..
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
He leaned off the deck, puked a waterfall of beer, looked back at everyone and said "it was just a burp".
I can dream in two languages, but it's still about ripping a bong.
I won't be able to get a boner for a month
Challenge accepted.
So i had a feeling this dude with one leg in a wheelchair was following me around Walmart turns out I was right. He just asked for a picture of my feet.
i mean i let him but still...
I dare you to find another dealer that delivers bud to your home along with deep fried vegan burritos
If those panties could talk.
"Once upon a time, Jenny got chlamydia from a magician. The end."
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I am NOT losing my v-card to a guy who doesn't know my ass from my elbow.
Randomize