why is it impossible to run with a back pack without looking like a giant d-bag?
haha... you gave me a great visual of you in high white socks running with a backpack with eye of the tiger playing in the background
that only happened once.
wasted. watching meteors, awesome idea i ever had, see 2 for every 1 with ma double vision
I just watched a blind kid buy from one of the vending machines on campus...guess there's nothing like a good surprise?
Aparently his snake got loose in the middle of the night. Not a sex joke, he has a fucking snake
That's why you NEVER put anything a stripper gave you in your mouth
also, just kill me. literally hit me with a vehicle, or an aircraft, something that will ultimately make me forget tonight.
Prepare for tons of dick. I mean dick by the bucket loads. Waterfalls if cock.
You know it's a good party when even the dealers were too fucked up. Just found and counted 140 E pills I found in a bag in the couch. Just paid for weed this month.
she looks like one of those semi-pretty girls that turns into a 9 while she's riding your cock like she's trying to catch a train on horseback.
You were supposed to behave this weekend.
But... naked.
I had to break it to her that she was not in fact behind the bushes when she peed on the church last night
We're at the liquor store. Then going to the hospital
im single, its not even nine am on Valentine's day and I've already gotten laid. suck it relationships
Any idea why my ass cheeks are bruised again?
The fact that theyre bruised AGAIN means you're not adult enough to know why.
I resent the implication of a jizz addiction
Randomize
