She was sucking his dick at Seacrets outside bar in front of all of us...her friends kept coming over crying and yelling "Tiffany stop it"
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
btw, her name was actually Alixx. in retrospect, it was pretty much a gimme
After the tests come back negative, you guys will look back on this evening with fond memories...
Changed my mind. Wearing a dress. Casual, with a side of breasts.
So I'm looking through your google history on your laptop and you have 'is ketchup even remotely nutritious' and 'alcohol with fewest calories but highest alcohol'. What new fad diet are you on because I feel like we could do this together.
Your expertise in crazy bitches is needed.
Um of course I blew him. He brought me a shamrock shake. It was two o’clock in the morning on St. Patrick’s Day. There was no smoother move basically. He totally earned that head.
Are you stuck outside of your house because you forgot to walk up stairs? Cuz I've been there.
Just wanted to say a big ole FUCK YOU for coming out to mom the day before I have to drive with her for 6 hours. Ass hat.
I made that picture of you my lock screen. So I've just been standing around at work licking my phone all day.
You asked me what the point was. Told me your were dying alone and then had me take you and Wendy's where you bought 3 meals and ate them in about 10 minutes saying you didn't care if you got fat...
So I just went to clothing optional bar
How drunk are you?
Completed.
I've decided I will have no shame for the things I don't remember doing.
Randomize
