she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
I'm watching Terminator eating a jar of marshmallow fluff. Trust me, you are not fat.
You're earring is so big in my mouth
I'm bakin' bread in my pussy!
What?
I have a yeast infection.
I feel like i made up for not being able to drink on St Pattys Day, Mardi Gras, and last years Cinco De Mayo. That hungover.
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
He literally had a note from his doctor saying he wasn't allowed to finger me for a week
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
Idk. Each time I ask him about double teaming a woman with Dennis Rodman he just giggles. We will never know what to believe.
Why did my little sister call me from your phone this morning?
Things like this can't be explained over text man
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
If I was banging all the guys that people think I am, I'd quit buying batteries.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
Wine through a straw in a subway cup.....classy
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