Her mom drove me home after I blew a .13 So there I am wishing her mom a happy mother's day sitting in the passenger seat where I just banged her daughter 15 min prior
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
you know you made it when your beer pong table is made from imported italian hardwood
someone lit off fireworks while I puked in the street. I was like congratulating me for making it through homecoming.
btw im using a cooler as a purse cause i love string cheese
I just showered sitting down with a sippy cup of water in there with me. It took 40 minutes. That hungover.
also I woke up naked and covered in water but nobody can explain that part.
I really enjoy how cavalier you're being about your chlamydia
You had a hat of bras. Probably a good dozen, which is totally impressive for a Thirsty Thursday
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
if it looks like there's being an exorcism being performed you know your doing something right.
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
Never in a million years thought I would have to put jello shot recipe/equation into an excel spreadsheet
I'm owning this being a social human being thing tonight!
Is there something wrong with us? Seriously.
Possibly, but I'd rather not fix it.
Randomize
