im too high. i could barely wash my hair, let alone handle a whole shower
on the last problem of the exam i just drew a picture of a cat and left
so it turns out, not only do the doormen judge the girls I bring home, but they rate them.
Your 'drink of the future' makes sense now- you feel it for atleast 10 hours into the future
Seriously wondering if smoking a bowl for lunch was a bad idea.
OR THE BEST. STAY TUNED.
she is legit wearing a plastic bag around her neck as a necklace. she says it serves two purposes.
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
She told me she gets scared easily and that I had to protect her. Then I made a condom joke that ended up making her cry... All bad dude
So coach him. No guy wants to admit being unsure of something in bed. It's a man-law or something.
The trainer from the tech college told me that I would pass the first aid course so long as I turned up sober. Challenge accepted
im currently assessing the tequila situation in preparation of your arrival
dude girls our age are getting married and having babies and I still can't figure out how to defrost my hotpockets
The stripper told Tom to sort his life out
Thanks to a bad fart decision during a production meeting, I am now on my way to Target to buy new pants. How is your day?
The sad moment you remember you have no power for a week and can't flush.....
Wrong number bro but that sounds like a damn shame.
Randomize
