Wait. When you mean sick you mean a cold sick right ? not something else.
We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
I basically have a picture with a half naked foreign exchange student. He kept screaming rolltide and i felt like a traitor
Pretty sure the shower sex fucked up my hip alignment... im walking like im 104 today
I flashed the bar tender last night. Apparently I wanted a whiskey to go and that was the golden ticket. This is why I never come home
Like I respect him so much I would suck his dick
In a very non respectful way
I don't want any of this. I just want big sausages.
It's all part of my master plan: have him buy me all I can eat pizza and all I can drink beer AND THEN tell him there was no spark and we're better off as friends.
Not gonna lie I just got drunk and started doing applications because I know I'm going into work tomorrow still drunk
handcuff keys just fell out of my bra....wtf happened last night?
Van sex tonight? No need to tell me how classy that sounded.
Thought for a game. Duck, Duck, Grey Goose. If you're tapped, you take a shot. Then proceed as normal.
If I shall die, I wish to bequeath to you my personal library, my sigma tau delta presidency and all it's apparel, and a puppy.
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
