Just mADE A PArabola og urine
all i remember is you climbed in a garbage can and said you were trashed
Party priorities: alcohol > girls > music > cups > decorations
How's work?
Spinning.
I slept with him to see his dog one last time
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
You grinded on me in Jimmy johns to a madonna song.
those kids just got delivered to the party by the pizza guy
I just stole a bunch of balloons from a birthday party and am giving one to each person at the bar.
Holy shit my cat won't leave the lube alone
Have you forgotten that this whole sexy cop role play started with a comment about my mom?
On a side note. I slept with a stuffed giraffe last night. Found it in my bed when I came home and snuggled with it. Drunk me reverted to being 2
I just put condoms in a mason jar because it looked prettier than the box.I think I've peaked.
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
We won like $80 last night at the casino, so if we get the Plan B we still have enough to get your basic bitch latte from Dunkin. Calm down.
Randomize
