Cruel joke of nature. Hair on head runs from face, and hides on various parts of body. Aging sucks.
I found out he doesn't have a facebook, twitter, or myspace. So, I'm going to actually go to his house to spy on him.
I've spent too much of my life staring at my bberry and counting to 5 to see if it blinks
I envy the lives of milf's kids, the little kid grabs her tits and she just laughs and says not now
And then she was like, "don't do anything. No blow jobs, don't let him stick his fingers in weird places because people have germs."
What's the big deal? you guys fuck
3 times is my limit. I don't even want to know you exist after 3 times
she's a dental assistant. she can get nitrous. kinda looks like a sloppy bucket of fuck. time to take one for the team. NEED SHOTS STAT!!
Good point, clearly my love of penis contributed to my torn knee ligament.
Girl just walked into the bar with a T-shirt that says "I'm not Irish, kiss me anyways." Target aquired.
i want to pour hot gravy all over you in bed
Do you think you could handle being our babysitter if we roofied ourselves for fun??
What kind of life do I lead that no one is surprised by the fact that I was watching porn at work with the hot 37 year old?
Oh my fucking god, I was conceived on the first date.
My boss spotted an injured PIGEON outside the front door this morning (at 3:30am) and requested that I catch it and take it to the vet. Catch it with what! Take it where!These requests have gone too far...
What is the best medium with which to say, "Happy Birthday, I'm having your abortion"... Cake? Card?
Randomize