your horoscope this morning...very interesting...good luck today
Her life has all the ingredients for a how to book: Making Your Life an Epic Fail
As long as you're not dating white guys again.
Whatevss it will be funn .. Hopefully no one projectile vomits on the wall again.. Its kinda become a tradition though
I just watched a woman in a full wedding dress and veil walk out of the chinese buffet...I no longer believe I have a problem, and am afraid I am underdressed.
Carpe scrotum. Grab life by the balls.
If I had to give her an idea on what it means to be ur date I would compare it to being Ralph macchio's gf in the first karate kid... That's one of the coolest things I've ever said... I love drugs.
i think maybe i'll just not watch it. i'd rather not think of you as a magical transforming set of dick holes.
I can always tell I missed tequila night based on the hickeys on your neck man. Fucking call me.
I think drinking White Russians at half past four in the afternoon is perfectly acceptable. I'd bought a LOT of milk and cream that needs to be used up. Resourceful, check, fuckable, check. You have a great girlfriend here pal.
Well, I guess that's how life goes for my dad. One minute you're walking with your cooler on the afterglow of a Lynyrd Skynyrd concert, the next you find your grown son choking out a drunk redneck against your pickup truck.
I have to call my new boss to accept the job offer so you have pack the bowl while I pretend I'm a responsible adult THEN we can get high
Seriously dude...who threw up on Michelle? She's been crying for like an hour
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
I woke up in a beaver hat and contruction vest.. I need answers.
Randomize
